Tuesday, February 9, 2010

i went to home depot the other day

to buy a piece of glass
11 7/8 x 14 7/8
it was going to have to be cut
custom
i was proud of my custom piece of glass
my chest stuck out
walking a little taller,
and then the window and door associate told me that,
home depot no longer cuts glass
he said that too many people were getting hurt...

11 7/8 x 14 7/8
custom
so i bought a 12 x 16
and a glass cutter
having a hard time accepting this
i was forced to imagine
a home improvement store
where they still cut glass
but there would have to be a little bottle of hand sanitizer
next to the glass cutter
the antibacterial kind
scented of course
something that reminds you of your grandmother

a large piece of my soul is dead now
left- back there
near aisle 15
by the uncut pieces of glass that can't harm anyone...
i walked away
thinking about everything that had just happened

as i scanned my own building materials
i could feel the remaining air being beaten from my lungs
11 7/8 x 14 7/8
it was all i could stand
i couldn't get out of there fast enough
i could barely even choke down the home depot hot dog
i left there
my uncut glass in hand
slightly hunched over
bloated
ashamed
back out in to the frigid cold
back out in to the world
and i realized that i was alone
with all of it
perhaps it was only for a brief moment
but i was empty
and i was cold
and i was afraid...

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