Saturday, October 30, 2010

when i was a boy

i remember the streets being on fire
glowing orange
and red
that smell is unmistakable
800 fires on one night, i think?

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

i got my oil changed today

but i really have nothing else to say
or talk about
but since i have this blog
i sometimes feel compelled
to say something
pictures of detroit

Monday, October 25, 2010

i was out to dinner the other night

the waitress was busy cleaning tables
moving chairs around
her shoes looked old
her makeup was bad
i imagined that she had a couple of kids
at home
an old buick skylark
bad credit
and sore feet?
the restaurant wasn't very busy
i watched her for at least 45 minutes
filling bottles
wiping tables
so much life-
being broken down right in front of anyone brave enough, to
watch it happen
i couldn't take much more
it was around 8:00
i went home
having eaten too much-

i was embarrassed

so i hurried to sleep...

Thursday, October 21, 2010

i had a lot to say, and

then today happened
this week
this month
this sentence happened...
and now i have nothing
i know less
feel less
more numb
more alone
more restless
and discontent
i had a lot to say, and
then i lost my faith
found a job
found a house
a car
some blue jeans
a belt that fit
i found 20 dollars
some cd's
some stickers
i had a lot to say, and
then i ate dinner
every night for
7 years straight
instead of going hungry
instead of getting angry
i found a king size bed
clean sheets
7 pillows
2 dogs
1000 anytime minutes
4 bedrooms
2 cars
1 garage
3 cameras
4 computers
i found a different god
a better god
one more suited
to co-sign my ideas
i had a lot to say, and
then my tv show came on
blu ray
asdf jkl;
thursday happened
life happened
blah blah blah...
fuck shit cock balls and ass
i had a lot say, and
then i said it all


Friday, October 1, 2010

life happens slowly

i had so much to say
but it has all escaped me
in this day
life happens slowly
i had such a great line, to insert
but it has escaped me
life crawls sometimes
mostly through the bad times
the winters
the nights
never when you're doing well
or making a shitload of money
that's when life passes you by-
it's more like when you're fucking up
sticking needles in to your arm
that's when life slows down
grinds to a fucking halt
and everything is magnified
it takes pain
and suffering
life happens slowly
i had such a great line to insert right here
and here
so slowly
eating shitty food from a soup kitchen
sleeping on some fuckin' junky's couch
it takes lice
and hemorrhoids
it takes bad skin
bad teeth
it happens slowly
i don't know about you
but i had to go out and create some hurt
before i could learn any lessons
pain has motivated me
brought me here
in front of this monitor
inserting lines
and i'm not talking about
some girl breaking your heart
or getting ripped off
life happens slower than that
then that
it's more like losing a career
or a house
or your daughter hating you
it's more like your parents dying
or herpes
or your best friend fucking your old lady:
that's life,
happening slowly
and it's magnified by
all of the careless mistakes
the ones that could have been so easily avoided
i had such a great line to insert right there

but what the fuck do i know
life happens slow
and it can't be manufactured
or glamorized
it has to be lived
each day
each moment
all the mistakes
the gods
the hospitals
the dry heaves
and fucked up skin
life happens on it's own terms
on it's own time
and i had such a great fucking line to insert right here
but it has escaped me
left me
and i am here
alone with life happening slowly.