Thursday, April 29, 2010

it has all brought me here

in front of this computer
on a thursday at 1:28 in the afternoon
having been to connecticut
to new york
now
back inside of my own walls
still, nothing to say
another road trip has come
and gone
good times
with good friends
a return to life
and i suppose i should be grateful for the break
for the courage to go out there
and do what others only talk about
dream about
i have the courage
the will
the fire, burning inside....
whatever...
fuck
here i am
with nothing to say
and a million more pictures to
help me along the way...


Saturday, April 10, 2010

i have realized

that i lack compassion
whatever that is
it is
i don't have it
i possess something else
all together
or it possesses me
it's more like an understanding
or no time for pretense
all of that has been stripped
or thrown away
by me no less
either way
i am indignant
and stubborn
and selfish
i have realized
that i am an asshole
and while that comes as no surprise
to most people
it does catch me a little off guard
i know that i'm not a nice guy
but i at lest thought that
i wasn't considered an asshole
but alas
i am
and i guess it's taking me some getting used to....
this is the best that i have come up with
no grandeur
no altruistic self searching
only the bottom line
the hard line
i am over here
on this side
mostly alone
accompanied by a few brave souls
compassionate enough to accept me
for who i am
an asshole who lacks tolerance and understanding
so
there it is
a new post
on this tired ass old blog
not sure how many more i have
left in me???